Clinical Psychology and Therapy Services ~ Herefordshire

Category: Understanding mental distress

It’s not me, it’s my nervous system

It can be helpful to know that your reactions, behaviour, emotional responses and thought patterns in any moment will likely occur much faster than you can control with any positive thinking or snazzy distraction technique. Its really helpful to have strategies available, but the truth is, your experience is determined much less via conscious choice and much more by your early experience and the way your nervous system learned to respond to the world.

Crying is healthy

Crying is a natural, (mostly) available, wonderful and (underused?) bodily function.


Do you cry much? Sadly, I think there is shame and insecurity attached to crying in our culture. I can recall times when the pain of holding back tears has been far worse than the pain driving them. Perhaps on some level we have grown up with an idea that crying is baby-ish or weak.

Good enough

In psychology, and particularly attachment theory, the concept of “good enough” refers to a parent who best serves their developing child by being “enough” rather than perfect. I love this. While a child needs an attentive and loving parent, they also benefit from seeing the reality of life, the struggles, emotions and challenges in manageable amounts.

Can I call it Trauma?

Our understanding of, and access to information about the impact of adversity on our humanness (minds – bodies – spirits – communities) has exploded over the past 20 years, and we are exponentially clearer that going through difficult things shapes our physical, spiritual and mental health.

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