Every single one of us gets activated.

We host a clever system which scans our environment constantly for threat and prepares us if it senses just the slightest danger. We wouldn’t be without that system – it’s beautiful and intelligent and it keeps us alive.

But the system is shaped and wired by our every experience, and it can get pretty sensitive.

Some people are born with a super sensitive system. If we have had frightening experiences, we accommodate by upping our defences. If we live in dangerous environments, are excluded or marginalised or feel unsafe a lot – our nervous system responds.

And whether it’s conscious or hidden, a constant state of hyper-vigilance is exhausting.

If you are able to find moments for safety and rest, you might want to communicate safety to your nervous system, or build your capacity for moving from threat to calm, to allow opportunities for restoration. Step one in this process is getting present. Grounding yourself in this moment.

In Polyvagal Theory this is getting back up to ventral vagal/ safe and social. You might think of it as getting back into into your window of tolerance. Being mindful. Finding calm.

I’ll never tell you the best ways to do this – yours will be different to mine, but I do find that including my body (not just my mind) in the process can be really helpful. Here are a few simple suggestions that work well for me. You’re welcome to them if you like them 🎁

  • Sit or stand with your feet firmly against the floor and let the earth hold you. Focus on the sensation of being grounded. Bare feet, outside for bonus points!
  • Breathe slowly and deeply. I like box breathing: in for 4; hold for 4; out for 4; hold for 4.
  • Move to a rhythm. This might be a gentle sway to a soothing piece of music, or tapping your body gently and compassionately. Search up “butterfly hug”
  • Shake your body gently starting with hands, feet arms, legs.
  • Dance to a familiar song. Try to focus on the movement of your body and the way it feels rather than how you look. Let your body move you.
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